tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7719553552257573432024-03-20T00:44:27.832-07:00The MA Lifek3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.comBlogger31125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-50023087505051318352010-03-26T10:36:00.000-07:002010-03-26T10:39:37.371-07:00Future Soccer Star?So it's been almost 2 whole weeks since I started feeling the little bean move around in there, and it's been getting stronger ever since. He or she has been so active, every day. I'm especially noticing movement right after lunch (like right now). Most of the time, it's on my left side, once in awhile on the right. But it's undeniable.<br /><br />I get so reassured every time I feel something, like a "It's okay, Mom...I'm still here!"<br /><br />I just can't wait for S to be able to feel it from the outside. Hopefully only another week or two for that.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-80852514846804599412010-03-15T13:41:00.000-07:002010-03-15T14:08:15.401-07:00I JUST FELT IT!!!!!!WHOA!!<br /><br />About 38 seconds ago, I totally, undeniably, unmistakeably, clear as a bell FELT THE BABY!!! It was so weird...like a weird, fluttery, pushy-pully movement on the left side of my abdomen. Weird description, I know, but I don't know how else to put it. I have been looking for it for the past couple of weeks and it was much stronger than I thought it would be. So crazy!! There really is a little person in there!!!!<br /><br />YAAAAAYYYY BABY!!!!k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-87819370233205199242010-01-24T15:11:00.000-08:002010-01-24T15:57:42.262-08:00It was the worst of times, it was the best of times<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTykB7wBjSVduI5WSkHPMxZWbF1MsuAZBnfVg_s4TVDsTMycq_YAQB06cREdiQBFYUavYMoK8QIE5EmrDqhEpoD4G17Vxe16meK-kaQexTRZoMNDEhG7OEDYCv9e9aoEnT6KGD3Qz59jUZ/s1600-h/Rav+crash.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTykB7wBjSVduI5WSkHPMxZWbF1MsuAZBnfVg_s4TVDsTMycq_YAQB06cREdiQBFYUavYMoK8QIE5EmrDqhEpoD4G17Vxe16meK-kaQexTRZoMNDEhG7OEDYCv9e9aoEnT6KGD3Qz59jUZ/s320/Rav+crash.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5430459520958755442" /></a><br />When I woke up Wednesday morning, I really thought Scott Brown winning the US Senate seat was going to be the worst thing that happened that day. Boy was I wrong.<br /><br />Before I get into details, let me first say that I am okay, and the baby is okay. No sense drawing out the melodramatics. But I definitely had the scare of my life Wednesday night, and hope to never, ever go through anything like that again. <br /><br />Okay, here's the play-by play:<br /><br />I left work Wednesday evening completely ravenous. I guess my cravings are kicking in, because all I could think about the entire way home was a big juicy burger with all the works. When I got home, Stacey asked me what I wanted for dinner. Immediately, I said "5 Guys". I had never had one of their burgers, but all afternoon coworkers had been raving about how they were the best burgers they ever had, and my mouth immediately started watering. <br /><br />Now normally we don't eat fast food. In fact, hardly ever. But just the day before Stacey and I had a conversation about not being crazy sticklers about my diet, as long as I was conscious about getting a steady supply of vitamins, minerals and DHA, which I was. Not to mention, we have been really good about not spending money when we don't have to, so it is very rare that we go out to eat instead of cooking at home. We agreed that giving in to a not-so-great craving once in awhile was okay, and it's not going to break our bank to spend $10 on take out...so dog-gone it, today was the day. I said, don't worry. I'll run out and grab dinner, and I'll be back in 20 minutes.<br /><br />About 15 minutes later, I was on my way home with my delicious smelling bag of burgers. I was about 5 minutes from home, when I went through a green light, only to have an idiot coming the opposite direction decide to turn right in front of me. Now, she didn't have a green arrow, and I had the right away (the policeman on the scene reiterated that fact), but that didn't seem to deter her from turning into oncoming traffic. I slammed on my brakes, but couldn't avoid getting hit. She crashed into my front driver's side, and my car went careening onto the curb and finally stopped about 8 inches from a light pole.<br /><br />I didn't get out of my car, I just sat there, panicking. I didn't care about the damage to my car, I didn't care about whether or not I was okay, all I could think about was the baby. I immediately called 911 (after I collected myself enough to remember how to use a phone.)<br /><br />"I've just been in an accident. Please come help me. I'm 10 weeks pregnant."<br /><br />The dispatcher was very calm and helpful, and police arrived on the scene within 3 minutes.<br /><br />"I'm 10 weeks pregnant" was all I could say to the officer who came up to my car. It was all I could think about.<br /><br />"Are you hurt?" they kept asking me.<br /><br />"I don't think so, but please, I need to go to the hospital. I'me 10 weeks pregnant."<br /><br />Panic was setting in, and the thought of my baby being hurt was too much to handle. I started crying uncontrollably, and couldn't speak. I called Stacey, and felt horrible because I'm sure my tears made her even more upset about the accident, but she was calm and wonderful. "It's okay, just tell me where I need to meet you", was all she said.<br /><br />All I could think about was, "Of course this is happening. Of course I'm going to lose the baby. This accident was supposed to happen because I'm not supposed to be a mother"...I mean <em>horrible</em> things. I tried to relax, and breathe deeply to stop the tears.<br /><br />The paramedics were very comforting, and walked me to the ambulance. Physically, I felt fine...no major damage. I walked by the other driver, and made eye contact, and she gave me a pathetic little smile as if to say, "I'm sorry." I was so filled with fear and rage at her, I couldn't manage a response. I just walked by.<br /><br />When I got to the hospital, Stacey was already there waiting for me, and was as scared as I was. The doctors and nurses at the hospital were very reassuring, and said at 10 weeks the baby is extremely protected, and if I wasn't feeling any cramping or bleeding, most likely the baby is fine. But they strongly suggested we call our OB right away and schedule an ultrasound, just for our own peace of mind. As soon as we got home, we did so, and the doctor on call told us he'd squeeze us in the next day for an appointment.<br /><br />Needless to say, we barely slept that night, and I prayed more than I had ever prayed in my life.<br /><br />I took Thursday off from work, as a day of recovery was definitely needed. We talked to the insurance company, we walked to pick up our rental car, and drove to the body shop where our poor car was taken. The whole front panel of the driver's side was missing, and it was then that I realized how lucky I was. A second sooner, and she would have hit my door. A second later, and I would have hit her, and the airbags surely would have gone off, probably hurting me and most likely seriously injuring the baby. A wave of emotion came overe me all over again.<br /><br />After the body shop, we waited for another hour or so, and finally it was time for our ultrasound appointment.<br /><br />Let me tell you, never in my life have my emotions skyrocketed from sadness and fear to bursting with eleation quicker than it did the moment we saw our beautiful little baby dancing around on that screen.<br /><br />Beautiful arms, beautiful legs, a perfect little head and an adorable little belly, with a strong healthy heartbeat that was music to our ears. Both Stacey and I immediately started crying. Our baby was okay.<br /><br />They whole rest of the day, we were on cloud nine. We sent pictures to our parents and closest friends, all of whom were thrilled. (We hadn't told them all about the accident yet...we thought we'd lead with the good news.)<br /><br />In less than 24 hours, we went from one of the scariest days of our lives to one of the happiest.<br /><br />I suppose that's parenthood for you, though. Boy, are we in for a wild ride.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-6452033216418305952010-01-19T05:37:00.000-08:002010-01-19T05:54:27.403-08:00Go Martha! Go Martha!It has occurred to me that in my excitement about growing a little bean I have completely forgotten to write about the other MA that this blog is about...our lovely adopted state of Massachusetts. We have been here for 5 months, 2 weeks and 4 days. In that time, we have gotten married (woo hoo!), went sight-seeing all over New England: we went hiking in Maine, visited friends in New Hampshire, explored Provincetown, toured the Witch museum in Salem, spent a weekend in NYC (twice), and enjoyed the holidays with relatives in New Jersey. And, oh yeah, just this morning we voted in the election for US Senator.<br /><br />The past few months have been crazy around here with the campaigning...it's been a very nasty fight, let me tell you. But with so much hanging in the balance, namely the possible passage/blockage of health care reform, it's easy to see why. At first, we thought there was no contest...this is Massachusetts after all...of COURSE a Democrat is going to win. But ohhh, how we were mistaken. This may be known as one of the most liberal states in the nation, but it seems the Reds are rallying. Especially here in Worcester County, aka Fox News Country. <br /><br />At my job I am surrounded by very outspoken conservatives and only a handful of closet liberals. Now, everyone here is very tolerant of me, and the fact that I am married to a woman (or at least they are civil to my face), but I have had to endure countless slams against "Flaming Liberals", "President Osama" and "The Big Government Machine". You would think my workplace was Scott Brown's campaign headquarters.<br /><br />So this morning, we did the only think we could...we got up early, drove through the snow, and voted (with all our might) for Martha Coakley, the woman who filed a lawsuit against the US government to repeal DOMA. For that reason alone, she is my hero.<br /><br />Go Martha!k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-42712835766805848412010-01-13T06:10:00.000-08:002010-01-13T06:43:59.841-08:00The Stress BallThe good news: As of today, we are 8 weeks and 5 days pregnant. The risk for miscarriage at this point is miniscule. I have symptoms galore, including nausea lasting all day, fatigue beyond belief, and huge painful boobs. I've even developed an obvious case of pregnancy brain, becoming much more scatter-brained and forgetful than normal. I have an increased sense of smell (about 5 minutes ago, I could smell the shampoo of a girl who walked by my office...not IN my office, BY it.) I've been having incredibly bizarre and vivid dreams, including getting into a sword fight with Jason Bateman, and my father growing a shark's head. I'm even developing a little pooch in my lower abdomen, right above the pelvic bone. I mean, I can SEE it growing. The proof is right there.<br /><br />The bad news: There is none.<br /><br />So WHY, pray tell, am I so freakin' paranoid??? Why am I fearing the absolute worst at every waking moment? If I am lucky enough to have a reprieve from the nausea, I get nervous that the pregnancy is ending. If I feel my abdomen and it doesn't seem bigger, or if I look in the mirror and I can't really see a difference in my breast size any more, I assume it's all over. Every time I go to the bathroom, I assume there's going to be blood when I wipe. Every time I feel a slight round ligament twinge, I assume it's the beginning of severe cramping and I'm starting to lose the baby. The stress is killing me, and I KNOW it's not good for the baby. I am trying to calm myself down, and be confident that this is a healthy pregnancy, and our baby is safe and sound. At night, I sleep with my hands on my abdomen and try to think soothing, comforting thoughts, coaxing the baby into staying put in its cozy little home. But then by the next day, the paranoia starts all over again, and I start to doubt that there's actually a baby in there at all.<br /><br />I think we got spoiled by our RE. Looking back, we had a doctor's appointment on average once every 5 days, and between blood tests and ultrasounds, we always knew exactly what was going on inside me. Well our last ultrasound was on Christmas Eve, and we don't go to our first appointment with the OB/GYN 'til the 29th. That's 5 whole weeks of being in the dark. I just want to see that heartbeat again, to hear it. We even purchased a Doppler fetal heart monitor, and it came in the mail Monday night. Of course, at 8 1/2 weeks, it was way too early to hear anything. So we put it away on a shelf in the bathroom, and told ourselves we'll try again next week. But honestly, I doubt I'll be able to wait that long.<br /><br />I hate myself like this. I hate that I can't just be giddy and excited and savoring every moment. Because the thing is, I love being pregnant, and I love the fact that we are going to be mommies in about 7 months. I already love this baby with all my heart, and can't bear the thought of anything bad happening to it. I just wish my head would shut up for awhile and let my heart do the thinking for once.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-90373693633130935152010-01-08T08:10:00.000-08:002010-01-08T08:14:54.600-08:00Our little baby's growing up so fast.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiD7d3MG55KLGHe8YuMDmc9ClruE7DvBaGb6Cj5OyE3ksHznkZKb75_7fQIoMvrg_Sh8aVPUiUACnhvJcTf1eB5kbN9ee1wjyS0fnGsDNsaBg0HWu9chJOoblsq2CIOcErlTRKO8IhZke6O/s1600-h/cap+n+gown.jpeg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 117px; height: 117px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiD7d3MG55KLGHe8YuMDmc9ClruE7DvBaGb6Cj5OyE3ksHznkZKb75_7fQIoMvrg_Sh8aVPUiUACnhvJcTf1eB5kbN9ee1wjyS0fnGsDNsaBg0HWu9chJOoblsq2CIOcErlTRKO8IhZke6O/s320/cap+n+gown.jpeg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424402479229654642" border="0" /></a>Today we are at 8 weeks, and the little bean has officially graduated from an embryo to a fetus. <br /><br />Way to go, little guy!! See what you can do if you put your mind to it?<br /><br />Now keep up the good work...only 32 more weeks to go!!k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-77445101393406356042010-01-06T09:13:00.000-08:002010-01-06T12:39:04.209-08:00just bursting with excitementSo, as I was standing at the kitchen sink this morning, filling a glass with water, I heard my wife (who was sitting at the kitchen table behind me) say in an oh-so-gentle tone,<br /><br />"Uh, honey? You think maybe it's time we look into a pair of maternity pants?"<br /><br />What, you don't like the stuffed sausage look? <br /><br />Personally I'm waiting for a button to physically pop off, or my seam to split straight up the back before subjecting myself to the humiliation of elastic-waist pull up pants.<br /><br />Although, to be fair, I do hear they are quite comfortable.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-86636921436616636272010-01-04T11:48:00.000-08:002010-01-05T05:51:57.853-08:00Hail MaryLet me start off with a disclaimer:<br /><br />I am not a religious person. At all. I was raised Catholic, and went through the whole dog and pony show...first communion, confirmation, Catholic School...the whole works. But I never truly believed any of it. Being Catholic, to me, was just part of who my family was, like being Italian or the fact that we were all Cubs fans. It wasn't until college (a Catholic school, mind you) that I started to realize I could choose my spiritual identity, and maybe this whole thing wasn't for me. Hey, I think Jesus was a great man and everything, and the Bible definitely has some great lessons in it, but as far as organized religious institutions go, well you can count me out.<br /><br />That said, I have to admit to a recent religious experience I had, for lack of a better term.<br /><br />When Stacey and I were in New York in November for our little weekend getaway, I had a few spare hours while Stacey had to put in some face time at a conference (the whole reason we were there, actually). I decided to stroll around Manhattan taking pictures of things that caught my eye. I got lots of cool snapshots of cab drivers, hot dog vendors, $5 Prada purse "salesmen"...you know all the great "New York-y" stuff. Along my stroll, I stopped at St. Patrick's Cathedral. Having never been inside, I was curious. One thing about the Catholic Church...as corrupt and backwards as it may be, you cannot deny the beauty of their houses of worship.<br /><br />I wandered through the cathedral, which was breathtakingly beautiful. I loved all the statues of saints, the candles, the kneelers, the marble. I took as many pictures as I could without being disruptive to the people there to actually pray. I worked my way to the front and saw a sign that said "No photographs beyond this point", and saw a little chapel-like area, with several people sitting (or kneeling) in pews, facing a large statue of the Virgin Mary.<br /><br />Now, as a recovering Catholic, I've always been a big fan of Mary. In fact, the only "Catholic" thing I still do is say 3 Hail Mary's every time I'm in a plane about to take off. Although that maybe more superstitious than religious, but whatever. So, perhaps I was just overcome by the sheer beauty of my surroundings, or the lovely serenity of the whole thing, but I put my camera away, took off my coat, quietly sat down in a pew and began to pray, for the first time in about 20 years.<br /><br />Knowing that we would be inseminating a week later, getting pregnant was the only thing on my mind. So, of course, that's what I prayed about. I just sat there, silently talking to Mary about how much I wanted to be a mother, how ready I was to be a mother. I talked about how hard I knew it would be, that it would be the toughest job of my life, but I wanted the chance to try. I talked about how much Stacey and I loved each other, and wanted to love and raise a child. I talked about how much Mary loved Jesus and how I wanted the chance to love a child like that. By the time I was through, I realized I had been crying. I quickly made the sign of the cross, wiped my eyes, and got up to leave.<br /><br />When I turned to leave the chapel, I immediately noticed a large statue of Elizabeth, holding a baby. As I am not up on my bible stories as much as I should be, I stopped to read the placard explaining the story. Elizabeth, it turns out, was visited by Mary when she was pregnant.<br /><br />Now I'm not a big believer in "signs" or "omens", but that moment resonated with me, and it took me all day to stop thinking about it.<br /><br />And I'm not saying it WAS a sign or anything, but hey, 2 1/2 weeks later we found out we were pregnant.<br /><br />I'm not saying, I'm just saying.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-65245069166613588012010-01-03T07:39:00.000-08:002010-01-03T08:14:29.319-08:00Now where was I...?6 months and 4 days.<br /><br />That's how long it's been since my last post. There's really no excuse for it. Well, that's not entirely true. But there's really no GOOD excuse for it. Basically (and you can laugh if you want), I thought I was jinxing myself. I thought that by documenting every single step of our TTC journey, I was somehow messing with the baby gods. Kind of like "the pot that is watched never boils" or something. I don't know. All I know is I was tired of writing over and over again how frustrating everything was...the two week waits, the ungodly amounts of money we were flushing down the toilet every month, the putting the whole process aside for months on end for whatever reason -- moving, getting settled, waiting for insurance to kick in. It became a very boring and unhappy blog to write, and (I'm sure) and even more boring and unhappy blog to read.<br /><br />So I stopped.<br /><br />Then, in November, after months of waiting for insurance to kick in so we could start TTC again, we realized insurance wasn't going to cover it after all. (Apparently fine-print loopholes we failed to read when we signed up for the coverage.) According to our plan, as a same-sex couple, we had to do 6 IUI's out of pocket before infertility treatments would be covered. We had only done two before we moved to Massachusetts, and had been waiting for the past 4 months. Which was upsetting and frustrating, because it meant we could have been trying all along, instead of just wasting time. So, we decided to start ASAP...if we had to pay for 4 more IUI's anyway, might as well get started immediately. So I called an RE, made an appointment for a consultation the 1st week of November and we were on our way.<br /><br />To make a long story short, here's how the rest unfolded:<br /><br />Got my period November 15th.<br />Went to RE for saline ultrasound November 17th...got the green light.<br />Went to New York City for a lovely weekend get away November 19th.<br />Went in for ultrasound on 11/24...3 big follicles...24 mm, 17mm and 14mm.<br />11/27, the day after Thanksgiving, IUI.<br />12/8, 10 dpo, 3:45AM, BFP!!!!!!!!!<br />12/9, 11 dpo, hcg level of 164<br />12/11, 13 dpo, hcg level of 534<br />12/17...RE wanted me to come in for an early US to make sure there was only one sac in there. Yep...just one. We are 4w,6d pregnant with one little bean.<br />12/24, Christmas Eve, second ultrasound. Saw heartbeat. Cried. We are 5w,6d pregnant.<br /><br />1/3, Today. 7 weeks,2 days pregnant. After feeling extremely nauseous, exhausted and emotional for the past 3 1/2 weeks, with boobs that make me cry out in pain when touched, I finally feel like I am pregnant enough to write about it to the whole world. I no longer feel like I will jinx anything if I blog about it...it's not going to go away just because I'm excited and talking about it. I can document my experiences and feelings and journey, and that doesn't mean it will all just end tomorrow. My paranoia about blogging was silly, I know. Because this is real, it's happening, and in about 33 weeks, we are going to be mothers. <br /><br />And I promise I will be writing about it ALL THE TIME now.<br /><br />Glad to see you again. It's been a long time. Talk to you real soon.<br /><br />Mek3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-87314065624375112412009-06-30T13:24:00.000-07:002009-06-30T13:40:40.586-07:00Okay...we can breathe now.So with all this obsessing over baby stuff, I have completely neglected the other aspect to this blog, and that is our big move.<br /><br />As mentioned, we found a place to live a few weeks ago in Worcester. Now, all we had to do was find someone to rent our condo. Since we can't sell right now, we have decided to rent out our place, and use that to help pay for the mortgage. Originally, a good friend of ours definitely wanted to rent our place, but couldn't commit until she got a firm job offer from Chicago Public Schools. CPS kept telling her, "we'll let you know." This started back in April, when they told her they'd let her know in May. May came around, and they told her they'd let her know in June. Today is June 30th, and they still haven't told her whether or not she has the job. And as frustrating as that has been for us, I can't even imagine how annoyed she must be. That's CPS for you. Although, that's a whole 'nother story.<br /><br />So, as much as we'd prefer to rent to a friend, someone we knew and trusted, we just couldn't wait anymore. We needed to list the place. We told our friend and she completely understood. So last week we told our friends on Facebook, put a listing on craigslist, and put fliers up all over Andersonville.<br /><br />Well, long story short, we got renters! They're this really sweet married couple that fell in love with the place when they came to see it yesterday, and really loved all the work we did on the place (thank you very much!). We did a credit check this morning, which they passed with flying colors, so I just emailed a copy of the lease over to them. They will move in August 1st, 2 days after we move out.<br /><br />I can't believe how smoothly this has worked out. We were really starting to get stressed out, which, you know, isn't very good for that <em>other</em> little project we're working on. So, now we can breathe at least one sigh of relief.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-25248190351465120702009-06-26T08:35:00.000-07:002009-06-26T08:48:29.935-07:00And now we wait.Yesterday was IUI #2 of this cycle. I am happy to say it went much more smoothly than the day before. The doctor did it again, I guess they wanted to cut to the chase, anticipating another rough one. It took all of 30 seconds. Also happy to say we had excellent sperm counts this month. Wednesday's sample was 69%, 52 million post thaw motility. Thursday's was 63%, 50 million. Yea for super-swimmers!<br /><br />So now, let the 2 week wait commence. We are trying our hardest not to think about it, which is a pretty unrealistic attempt. How do you put something out of your mind that you are shaping your whole life around? No drinking alcohol, no coffee, no coke because you may be pregnant. But don't think about it! Daily doses of estrogen, progesterone, prenatals, and folic acid because you may be pregnant. But don't think about it! No strenuous excercise, no heavy lifting, no stress or anxiety because you may be pregnant. But don't think about it! Summer celebrations and visits with friends, the Pride Parade, Taste of Chicago, 4th of July...where they will inevitably notice a lack of "celebrating"...but don't think about it, and certainly don't talk about it!! It's impossible to live your life normally during the 2ww, where your whole life revolves around a remote possibility, a question mark. <br /><br />But we do it, again and again and again.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-26734985946204589422009-06-24T19:02:00.000-07:002009-06-24T19:17:38.986-07:00IUI Try #2: The Brick WallSo the first of 2 IUIs was this morning, and it definitely did not go as smoothly as I would have liked. Apparently I have a very stubborn cervix, because the nurse could not get the catheter in. She tried for about 10 minutes, poking and prodding around my nether regions, but to no avail. So she excused herself and went to get another nurse, to see if she could have any success. Nurse #2 tried and tried...a bit too roughly I might add, but again, no luck. So she left to find the doctor, because surely he would be able to get through my brick wall. Mind you, this entire time I am lying on the table with my feet in the stirrups, positioned for all the world to see my business any time someone new wanted to come into the room.<br /><br />The doctor finally came in and apparently was determined to get this bad boy in, because he kept murming and muttering under his breath the whole time, as if he were fighting some sort of battle he refused to lose.<br /><br />FINALLY, he got in, let loose the swimmers, and all was right with the world again. He explained to me that my cervix is crooked, and that we should hope very much that we are successful with IUIs, because graduating (or is it being demoted?) to IVF would be a very complicated process for me. "I wouldn't want to damage those fragile embryos by trying to force them through your cervix" is how the doctor put it. So I would have to have my cervix dilated surgically each time, which would certainly NOT be fun.<br /><br />So, here's to hoping we end our journey with IUI, because as much as I am not looking forward to repeating today's ordeal again tomorrow, it is a much less invasive option than IVF would have in store for me.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-66749367030928301092009-06-23T15:23:00.000-07:002009-06-23T15:32:16.854-07:00And We're Off!Back at the RE this morning for yet another ultrasound and more bloodwork. This time, however, there were only 3 mature follicles (much more sane than the seven from last month). They could tell from my LH levels that I am most likely about to ovulate, so they gave me a prescription for the hcg trigger shot, told me to administer it right away, and come back bright and early tomorrow for my IUI.<br /><br />Stacey was at work, so this shot thing was going to have to be up to me. Giving myself the shot was weird. I did okay I guess, but I definitely took a minute or two psyching myself up for it. I really, really, really hope that this was the one and only time I had to do it. It's not the sort of thing I particularly want to become good at.<br /><br />So tomorrow morning at 7:30 I have an IUI, then I come back 24 hours later for the second IUI. I am really excited of course, but sad that Stacey can't be there. She has to be at work by 9am, and it takes her an hour and a half to get there. It feels weird that she won't be there for the insemination. In spirit, though, she will definitely be there in spirit.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-86190640292662038452009-06-15T10:26:00.000-07:002009-06-15T10:35:06.100-07:00right back on that horseToday is day two of this brand new cycle, so Stacey dropped me off at the doctor's once again on her way in to work. Once again, I had my plumbing checked with the oh-so-embarrassing dildo-cam. Once again, I had my blood drawn (my right elbow is starting to resemble a well-worn dartboard).<br /><br />Now is the part where I wait for the phone call from the nurse to tell me we are all systems a-go, I go pick up my prescriptions for clomid and estrogen, and get told when I can go in for my follow up ultrasound, probably about a week from now.<br /><br />I am becoming a pro at this game, which (believe me) is not something I am proud of.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-11395698977177497442009-06-13T08:01:00.001-07:002009-06-13T08:23:52.682-07:00PerspectiveYesterday was a pretty hard day, I'm not going to lie. I was an emotional basket case all day. I think I cried (sobbed) about 8 times. The icing on the cake was when we went to see Up, in an effort to lift our spirits. Well there was a montage about 5 minutes in that was so very touching, and halfway through that there was a sequence that hit a bit too close to home. I lost my marbles, and starting sobbing once again. Fortunately, the sad part was over within the first ten minutes, and the rest of the movie did its job...we were laughing throughout and our spirits were definitely lifted. It felt nice to laugh after such a devastating day.<br /><br />I feel much better about our life today than I did yesterday, but it's certainly not because a silly movie made me smile. I just had a hard, cold splash of reality knock me out of my pity party and get a bit of perspective.<br /><br />Yesterday, a childhood friend of mine told me he and his family were going through a rough time right now. Turns out, his wife (who is my age) has cancer. They just found out, and she is prepping for chemo and radiation. They have 3 kids under the age of 6.<br /><br />I immediately went from thinking "35 is way too old" to "35 is way too young".<br /><br />I went from wondering what the hell is wrong with me to being grateful I am so healthy.<br /><br />I went from being jealous of everyone who had kids to being worried sick about those three boys.<br /><br />I went from thinking "why not?" for me to "why?" for somebody else.<br /><br />Suddenly, I am thankful for everything Stacey and I have, not pining for something we don't. And I realized how much this BFN is not a tragedy, and our problems are not so catastrophic. <br /><br />Nothing like a little perspective, huh?k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-47393600065304156412009-06-12T15:19:00.000-07:002009-06-12T15:21:32.969-07:00Thanks for playing.The blood test resulted in a big fat negative. I'll write more tomorrow when I pull myself back together. Right now, I just need some... I don't know. I just need something and writing ain't it.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-66245741582088270692009-06-11T18:31:00.001-07:002009-06-11T18:32:05.792-07:000 for 2Tested again this morning. Still negative. I gotta admit, my confidence about this blood test tomorrow is starting to waiver.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-81819195892204840312009-06-10T02:27:00.000-07:002009-06-10T03:49:07.019-07:00Impatience and InsomniaIt's 4 in the morning, and I can't sleep a wink. I am dying to test today. It's 12 days since the IUI, and any trace of the hcg trigger shot should be gone. And I don't want to jinx anything, but I have a really good feeling about this month. Since last Thursday I've been feeling a very localized pinchy-pokey feeling in the left-center of my abdomen. Coupled with the fact that I had some light pink spotting yesterday and the night before, and I'm really hoping it is what I think it is.<br /><br />We are scheduled to go in for our blood test on Friday morning, but there's no way in hell I can wait that long. Neither of us can. So I think this is it. In a few hours (we'll wait for the sun to come up at least), I will pee on a stick.<br /><br />Fingers crossed!!<br /><br />**5:48am. BFN...for now.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-43172881836055615472009-06-08T15:40:00.000-07:002009-06-08T16:02:44.702-07:00Welcome to Wustah!We just got home from our apartment-hunting trip to Worcester, MA. After sifting through hundreds of craigslist ads, making dozens of phone calls, and seeing about 12 places, we finally made a decision and picked a place. Or should I say, the place picked us.<br /><br />We were just about settled on a beautiful 2 bedroom flat up in Greendale, on the third floor of a triple-decker, on the top of an enormous hill overlooking all of Worcester. I am not exagerrating when I say the view was breath-taking. I literally gasped. However, the landlord was iffy about the dog. He agreed to take him after we promised he wouldn't be a problem (which in all honesty isn't entirely true. The dog can be a little shit sometimes). Anyway, he agreed to the dog. We were thrilled, drove back to the realty office with our agent, and gave him the deposit. He did tell us though, that we could still change our minds and get the deposit back.<br /><br />After we left, we were tempted to cancel our next appointment which was to see a little 2-bedroom that was in walking distance to UMASS. But, what the hell, we thought, seeing one more won't hurt. So we reluctantly went to see this place.<br /><br />We walked in, and immediately, Stacey and I looked at each other, and we knew. This was our home. Cozy, warm and charming, with 2 bedrooms, a huge kitchen, french doors, old-fashioned built-ins, an enclosed front porch and (best of all) a large semi-enclosed yard with a beautiful old oak tree in the middle. We can grill, sit at a picnic table, the dog can run around...it's perfect! Trust me, when you're used to a small cramped apartment with no yard or private deck, these things are huge! We were sold.<br /><br />We told our agent for the place on the hill we weren't going to take it, and in all honesty it was a relief. Now we don't have to worry about our dog being a dog...the landlord for the cozy place loves dogs, she even said we could put up a dog run in the yard for him!<br /><br />So now we are back in Chicago, anxiously awaiting our big move east to our new home! Seven weeks to go!!!k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-20321464351542793272009-05-30T07:38:00.000-07:002009-05-30T07:50:11.340-07:00New BeginningsYesterday was my 35th birthday. It was also our 4th attempt at TTC. However, it was the first one where we actually had some insight into what we were doing exactly. We had an ultrasound on Thursday and saw 7 follicles. We got an hcg trigger shot on Thursday night and progesterone suppositories to start taking today. We learned that our swimmers have rally good numbrs - 35 million count, 56% post-thaw motility. We had an IUI yesterday, administered by an RN, instead of the old fingers-crossed shot-in-the-dark method at home. We have an appointment to go back in 13 days for our pregnancy test. Everything we are doing this time is so much more cinical, monitored and enlightened. Both Stacey and I have a really good feeling about this, for many reasons.<br /><br />I was in a wonderful mood all day yesterday, partly because it was a beautiful day, partly because it was my birthday, but mostly because this attempt feels really good. I hope I'm not jinxing anything, but I just know that whatever the outcome, we are headed in the right direction. Every month, we are a step closer to becoming mothers, I can feel it.<br /><br />I know this is going to be a wonderful year. So far, 35 is a great age, and I know it will only get better.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-16381881976649829702009-05-28T15:51:00.000-07:002009-05-28T16:23:29.151-07:00Too Much of a Good Thing?Stacey and I woke up this morning at 5:30, all bouncy and excited for our Day 10 check-up at the RE. This was the day they were going to tell us whether or not I am producing any follicles, how mature they were, and when we can come back for the IUI. So I hopped up on the exam table, and Ultrasound Lady wielded her magical Dildo-Cam and <em>Voila</em>! Up on the screen popped my girl parts. I sat up as much as I comfortably could and tried to watch the show.<br /><br />"Wow," Ultrasound Lady said. "That's a big follicle! 24.5 millimeters." Woohoo!! Great news!<br /><br />"Oh, look at this one, too. This is a big guy here, too." Great! TWO big follicles.<br /><br />"Here is another one." Three?<br /><br />"And another one". <em>What???</em><br /><br />"Okay, now let's look at your right side. Whoa! Look at these guys!"<br /><br />Turns out, I have SEVEN mature follicles. To say my body responded to clomid is an understatement. So, Stacey and I left and came home, elated. Seven mature follicles, that's great news, right?? We sat and waited for the RE to call us in the afternoon to tell us when we could come in for the IUI.<br /><br />Around 2:30, the call came. Only it wasn't good news.<br /><br />"I'm sorry Kelly," the nurse began, "but you produced too many follicles. The risk for multiples is too great. We cannot inseminate this month."<br /><br />My heart got caught in my throat. I tried to maintain composure, but lost that battle quickly.<br /><br />"What do you mean we can't inseminate?" I asked. My voice cracked, betraying my devastation. "This was the doctor's idea. He prescribed the clomid! If I don't use it, I don't produce follicles, and now that I did use it, I produced too many???"<br /><br />"I'm sorry Kelly, but for women 34 and younger, we cannot inseminate if there are more than 4 follicles."<br /><br />"But I'll be 35 tomorrow!!! What's the cutoff for 35??"<br /><br />"5 or 6. But still, it's a big risk." I told her I was aware of the risks, but she said there wasn't much she could do, it was the doctor's decision. She did agree to try to get ahold of him again, to see his thoughts about the fact I will be 35 tomorrow. And she promised to call me back right away.<br /><br />The next hour passed veeeery slowly. I dropped Stacey off to get a massage, went to the grocery store, came back home, pickeed up the dog, and went to wait for Stacey. I was trying not to be heartbroken, but I knew I couldn't fight it. I was sad we'd have to wait another whole month. I was pissed that the doctor prescribed us a drug that apparently backfired. I was annoyed that we just spent almost $1000 for this month's attempt, only to be told we couldn't attempt at all. And I was starting to get afraid it was never going to happen for us. <br /><br />An hour later, the nurse called back.<br /><br />"I talked to the doctor, and since you will bee 35 tomorrow, we can go ahead and do the IUI. But we want you to take the trigger shot tonight, and we will only be doing one IUI tomorrow."<br /><br />Fine! Anything! Oh my god, this is wonderful news!!!!! Thank goodness for birthdays!!! I never thought I'd be so excited to turn 35! <br /><br />Immediately we went to the pharmacy to pick up my trigger shot, along with progesterone suppositories to start tomorrow night. I can't believe we are really doing it. Yes, we have a slight chance for multiples, yes we have to sign a mountain of paperwork tomorrow, and yes there is a big chance none of this will work anyway. But we are trying. We are going in tomorrow - me, Stacey and our seven follicles - and we are going to give it our best shot.<br /><br />Keep your fingers crossed for good things!k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-33591904465868815842009-05-25T20:30:00.000-07:002009-05-25T21:17:51.704-07:00Little HandWhat a fantastic day.<br /><br />Today was Memorial Day, so we slept until we were good and ready to get up, then shuffled into the kitchen to make tea, put on some music, and started our day. I cleaned the kitchen while Stacey packed up a bunch of boxes in the dining room next to me. In the afternoon, we decided to take a stroll through Andersonville, get some hot chocolate and do some window shopping. Stacey was itching to go look at some baby clothes, which I was reluctant to do. I have to admit, I was a bit relieved that because of the holiday, most of the little boutiques she wanted to go in were closed. It started raining, so we ducked into Alamo Shoes, for no reason other than we had nowhere else to go. Let me just say, I am really glad we did.<br /><br />We were in there about 3 minutes, and had barely begun to peruse the shelves of overpriced shoes when my baby radar started going off. One row over was an adorable 18-month-old girl who was toddling towards me. She was so smiley and outgoing. I looked down at her and smiled, and immediately I saw her hand go up, as if to grab mine. Not wanting to seem like a creepy baby stalker, I took a step back. I didn't want her mom, who was keeping a watchful eye, to think I was a baby-snatcher or anything. But the little girl was on a mission...she continued to toddle towards me. I glanced at her mom, who was smiling, so I thought, "Hey, if she's cool with it, I'm cool with it." So I let her grab my hand, and that was that...I was hooked.<br /><br />I let her lead me toward the kids shoes, then I crouched down and showed her the amazing and wondrous shoe mirror on the floor. I complimented her on her cool red raincoat and green boots. She smiled and babbled and laughed. I thanked her for playing with me and led her back to her mom, and I did so quickly to avoid falling even more in love with her than I already had.<br /><br />Now, I know I can definitely be sappy at times, and more than a little melodramatic. I tend to find symbolism and omens in every little out-of-the-ordinary occurance, and am a firm believer in "signs". I don't think this was any of those. I just know that the feeling I got from this little stranger putting her hand in mine was wonderful. My heart felt full. <br /><br />I'm not fool enough to think that this meant anything about our upcoming cycle. I just know that it reaffirmed what I already knew: I am so ready to be a parent. I want it so badly, it hurts. I am ready to give a child my love, whether it comes out of my body, or Stacey's, or a stranger's. If I can fall in love with a child in 30 seconds flat, God knows the limits of the love I can give my own child.<br /><br />But the best part of today was the fact that it did not make me impatient or frustrated about having a baby. Rather, it just made me realized that when it does happen, I will be ready, and I know it will be more wonderful than anything I could ever have imagined.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-40603535838354134142009-05-21T11:53:00.000-07:002009-05-21T12:49:52.215-07:00A Day in the Life (or lack thereof)Today is exactly two weeks since I've been laid off. Week one was a fun, novel, refreshing reprieve from the crazy rat race I'd been stuck in for the past 13 years. Week two, not so much.<br /><br />Here is a rough breakdown of my daily activities for the past two weeks:<br /><br />7am: Wake up, spend some time with Stacey before she goes to work. Walk the dog.<br /><br />8am-11am: Check my email, baby forums, various blogs, favorite websites, peruse apartment listings. Tell myself to get off the couch and be productive. Check email, baby forums, various blogs, favorite websites, apartment listings <em>one last time, </em>you know, in case anything new popped up.<br /><br />11am: Get off the couch. Go to the kitchen for something to eat/drink. Make a list of everything I need to get done. Tell myself I will be productive. Start my chores, and then think of something I need to look up online. Get sucked back into checking email, baby forums, various blogs, favorite websites, and apartment listings, <em>real quick, and then that's it for the day</em>.<br /><br />12pm: All My Children. (Yes, I know, I know. It's humiliating, and I'm not quite sure how it happened, but I tell you, that show is more addicting than crack. I have turned into the quintessential, sterotypical housewife, complete with favorite IQ-melting soap opera.) <br /><br />1pm: Do chores (for real this time). Go for a walk. Wish I had someplace to actually walk <em>to</em> or someone to walk <em>with</em>. Get bored. Come home. Try to find something to do. Go back online.<br /><br />2pm: Try to write a post in my blog. Realize my life is a complete bore right now, and I am only able to come up with an inane rundown of my incredibly boring day.<br /><br />2:15pm: Miss my old job.<br /><br />2:15:01pm: Snap back into reality and remember that my job sucked the life out of me.<br /><br />2:17pm: Wish I had some other stay-at-home friends to play with. Or, friends that would let me hang out with them at their jobs while they work. Anything, just so I can be around people again.<br /><br />2:30-4:30. Study for the GRE. Clean up a little. Maybe get around to taking a shower.<br /><br />4:30. Start thinking of what to make for dinner. Hopefully come up with something that calls for a trip to the grocery store, just so I can have an excuse to go somewhere.<br /><br />6pm: Wait for Stacey to get home. Study. Listen to music. <br /><br />7pm: Wait for Stacey to get home. Hopefully there is a Cubs game to turn on.<br /><br />8pm: Wait for Stacey to get home. Start dinner.<br /><br />9pm: Stacey comes home, and I am a puppy delirious with excitement when she walks through the door. Exhaust her by demanding all her attention. <br /><br />10pm: Realize that after only two weeks, I have turned into a completely bored, dependent, unchallenged, self-pitying, needy, uninteresting shell of my former self. I've got to find something to do with my time. This is ridiculous.<br /><br />11pm: Right before bed, realize I need to check my email, baby forums, various blogs, favorite websites and apartment listings, one last time. Heaven forbid I miss something <em>really </em>important.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-37259647994794545822009-05-19T10:37:00.000-07:002009-05-19T11:52:38.000-07:00I Never Was A SoloistJust this morning, I was telling Stacey about a memory that had just come back to me, after about 26 years of suppression.<br /><br />When I was in the 3rd grade, our school's music teacher had us put on a recital for the other students. For the recital, we could pick any song we had learned during the school year. We could do a solo, or a duet, or both if we were ambitious. The year was 1983, and my favorite movie was "Annie", so of course, I chose the dramatic, soaring, not-a-dry-eye-in-the-house classic, "Maybe". I was gonna bring the house down, no doubt about it.<br /><br />During the week before the recital, my best friend Mervet asked me if I would do a duet with her, as she was too scared to sing a solo. Amused at her childish stage fright, I humored her. I assured her she had nothing to worry about, because with a partner like me our duet was going to kill. Especially after "Maybe" brought the crowd to their knees. They'd be <em>demanding</em> an encore from me. Mervet was smart to want to collaborate with me. I still remember the song we picked, "Together Wherever We Go." <br /><br />"Wherever I go, I know she goes. Amigos. Together." You know, that one.<br /><br />The day came for the recital. We all piled into the music room. I can't remember if parents were there or not. Looking back, I certainly hope not. One by one, and some two by twos, the 3rd graders performed their songs. As I watched them, something changed in me, and my smug confidence somehow abandoned me. My heart started to pound. My throat closed up. I thought there was a very real chance I might wet myself. I wanted desperately to tell our teacher I changed my mind.<br /><br />Suddenly I heard my name called. "And next we have Kelly, performing 'Maybe'."<br /><br />Applause, applause.<br /><br />I made my way up to the front of the room, successfully avoiding eye contact with everyone present. My teacher began the first few notes of the piano accompaniment, then it was my cue. I looked at the crowd of faces, and froze. Nothing came out. Not one note.<br /><br />She played the intro again.<br /><br />I stayed frozen.<br /><br />Kindly, she began a third time, and started singing the words to help me along. I tried to squeak out a few words, but could only manage a whisper. I thought my teacher was doing a fine job singing the song on her own, so I just kind of gave up and let her do it. Mercifully, she ended the song after the first verse. There were a few giggles, a sympathetic smattering of applause, and I quickly sat down next to Mervet, covered my face with my hands, and cried.<br /><br />Mervet was as comforting as she could be, considering the fact that in a few minutes she'd have to go back onstage with this sniveling mess next to her.<br /><br />"C'mon," she whispered, "you were fine. You did great." But even as she held my hand, the look on her face was one of sheer terror. <br /><br />After a few more songs, I was due up onstage again. Mervet somehow pulled it together enough to put a smile on her face and drag me up next to her. We stood there, looking at the crowd. The piano accompaniment started, and Mervet began to sing.<br /><br />"Wherever we go, Whatever we do, We're gonna go through it together..." She looked at me and smiled. I smiled back and jumped in: "We may not go far, but sure as a star..."<br /><br />And just like that, everything was okay.<br /><br /><br />Flash forward 26 years.<br /><br />After sitting on the sofa this morning, enjoying a nice leisurely cup of coffee with the wife (after telling her the above story), I got a surprise visit from my dear old aunt. So I immediately called FCI to schedule my baselines tests and initial ultrasound. I like the fact that we are starting again right away, and the fact that this time we are getting help from the experts. I'd actually be really excited about it, except for the fact that Stacey can't go with me tomorrow.<br /><br />She is going to drop me off for my appointment at 7:15 on her way to work, and in I go by myself. I'm not a huge baby or anything, I mean I can handle a doctor's appointment by myself, but this process, the whole "making a baby" journey has been one we've done together, every step of the way. It's been really important to us that we do this as a team as much as possible. I mean, this is OUR baby, not just mine, and we want to make sure everyone is clear on that. Going to the doctor to start try #4 without her feels weird and wrong.<br /><br /><br />I never was a soloist.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-771955355225757343.post-7458313797009841582009-05-18T08:30:00.000-07:002009-05-18T09:00:43.876-07:00The Next StepAfter a particularly <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">un-enjoyable</span> weekend of mourning our latest failed attempt, dealing with raging hormones (thanks, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">prometrium</span>!), long work hours (Stacey, obviously, not me), and general feelings of irritation and annoyance towards each other caused by all of the above, we each took a deep breath, sat down, and talked things over.<br /><br />We realized that we may have exhausted our Do-It-Yourself opportunities, and have decided to put our fertility concerns in the hands of professionals. And while playing doctor, keeping it intimate, and conceiving a baby the old fashioned way (well, as old-fashioned as two women could possibly make it) has been fun, the fun is definitely over. It is now just uncomfortable, unpredictable and frustrating. For three attempts we have purchased swimmers, took a shot in the dark (pun intended), and kept our fingers crossed. We've basically been buying $2500 worth of lottery tickets, and expecting to get rich. Well as the daughter of a banker who's been on my case about my financial security for the past 35 years, I've learned that's not exactly a sound plan for success. <br /><br />So, we are taking the next step, and moving onto in-office <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">IUIs</span>. We called <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">FCI</span>, got a breakdown of costs (for us, fertility treatments are 100% out-of-pocket. Another reason I can't wait to move to MA), and decided that the benefits outweigh the costs. We will wait for my cycle to begin, then go into the office for an ultrasound, come back when we're ready to dance, and do the deed. I think we will do two tries, about 12 hours apart. Adding together the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">bloodwork</span>, ultrasounds, prescriptions, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">IUIs</span>, and trigger shots, we're looking at about $1600. Not that much more than we've been paying each month for the "shot-in-the-dark" method.<br /><br />So now, we just wait for CD1. I stopped taking the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">prometrium</span> last night, so hopefully my body won't take that long to bounce back to normal. We are just praying I start before the weekend. If it's this weekend or later, there's a good chance I'd be ovulating during our apartment-hunting trip to MA. That would be awful. Is there anything I can do to induce CD1? Coffee? Spicy food? Jumping on a trampoline??? Any and all suggestions welcome.<br /><br />So, next step, here we come. I really hope this is as far as we have to climb on this wretched ladder of infertility.k3200nhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02509570024125248804noreply@blogger.com3